Exact Dates of the End of the World

April 12th, 2010 by jlphillips

There have been predictions regarding the end of the world for centuries. Everyone from your grandmother to your orthodontist Las Vegas practitioner has probably told you. It seems like many folks out in Las Vegas are believers. You say your orthodontist only uses state-of-the-art technology and the most advanced procedures available to ensure you will achieve a brilliant healthy smile you’ve always dreamed of having, and does not predict the end of the world. OK, perhaps I was being a bit overly dramatic. But if it does occur during your life time, at least you will go out with straight teeth and a beautiful smile!

  • 70 AD: the fall and desecration of Jerusalem ended the world, according to the Preterists. Whoops.
  • 500: Hippolytus of Rime worked out the Biblical ‘6,000 year rule’ to apply to this year. For more fun with that same figure, keep reading.
  • 989: Halley’s Comet always brings impending doom. Just ask Mark Twain.
  • 1000: very little of an apocalyptic nature happened this year, aside from a bunch of Christians getting worked up about the rather flexible millennium date.
  • 1874: the Jehovah’s Witnesses begin a long and lucrative career of predicting Armageddon, starting with this year. BTW: it didn’t happen.
  • 1878: It didn’t happen this year, either.
  • 1881: no, really…the JW’s were on a roll.
  • 1910: again? Well, if you Witnesses say so.
  • 1914: people are probably starting to wonder about Jehovah’s Witnesses.
  • 1918: we like the four-year cycle, but could the Jehovah’s Witnesses maybe split it up into a summer apocalypse and a winter apocalypse?
  • 1925: about this time, people may be forgiven for hoping that the world ends just to shut the Jehovah’s Witnesses up about it.
  • 1975: they gave us a 50-year break (which included WWII, which was chock full of apocalyptic signs) but those scrappy Jehovah’s Witnesses aren’t done yet.
  • 1982: “The Christ is Now Here”, according to the Tara Center, who later state that He’s not ready to reveal himself after all.
  • 1984: Orwell buffs and Jehovah’s Witnesses alike considered this to be a significant year. Unless Van Halen is the antichrist (not unproven), they were probably all wrong.
  • 1994: Nostradamus tries posthumously to beat the Jehovah’s Witnesses record for most failed predictions. Luckily, he’s much more vague and obscure, so he’s never really wrong
  • 1997: No, really, the Christ is Now Here, according to Share International (a.k.a. the Tara Center). Interestingly enough, The Christ (a.k.a. Maitreya) tops the list of several groups who believe him to be the Antichrist instead. Either way is okay with us — we still get apocalypse!
  • 1998: This is the year, says Nostradamus and others (and maybe not even him). For example, Eli Eshoh proved that the Rapture was going to happen, and by golly, it did (didn’t you notice?). We’re still not sure who were raptured, but those of us Left Behind should watch out for 2028. Two ends of the world for the price of one? Good deal!